A New Year

As I was chatting with a friend the other day I was thinking about my life and how much of it revolves around school years. Because my occupation as a teacher requires me to take a summer holiday for months at a time and then start over with a new set of students, well I see my life in school years. When I ponder over the past 11 years, I am simply amazed by what has happened and changed. I realized also just the other day that I have moved every year for the past 11 years. Sometimes jobs and homes, but at least just homes for the past 11 years. No wonder I do not feel planted anywhere. At first after high school graduation my moves just consisted of dorm rooms and going to home/Rawhide for the summers. Then after college well my first move was back home then to Egypt and I have pretty much continued moving ever since. From a house in Oside back to the ranch, then to an apartment, then to the CB in Bangkok, then to a house, then another apartment and tomorrow marks yet another move.

Whew! That sure is a lot of moving. No wonder I feel like there is nothing permanent in my life. I mean this is the first "grown-up" job that I have had that has lasted for longer than a year, and more than that I am going to be starting my third year here. Maybe it is time to settle down, but maybe it is not. Whatever it is though I want to be able to set some goals for this coming up school year.

I think the Lord has taught me a lot about trust this year. Trusting when I don't quite understand what the future holds. Trusting when people let me down. Trusting when I am the center of idle gossip and the target of jokes or insincere words by others. Trusting when I feel pulled in a direction that I am just not ready to go to quite yet. Trusting when it hurts so much to trust. Trusting when He is calling me to just let go. Trusting that God is good and He has good purposes for my life. Trusting that He has forgiven me and that He lifts me up! You see trust, well it is tough for me, who has had tons of people in and out of my life. Also, when I feel like in many instances my lack of trust has pushed people away. I don't want to be that person that doesn't let people in. I know that my heart has been hardened in some areas because I have mistrusted or trusted to much and then once I am hurt that place just gets hard as I try not to get hurt again. But I have learned this year, that people aren't perfect, but God is.

I don't have to trust people in my own flesh and weakness. I have to trust people in Jesus' love and righteousness. For I know that I am always going to get hurt by others, I will probably also do my share of hurting. But what I do know is that God is the ultimate healer and so I can trust because He is the one I am trusting. I put my faith and hope in Jesus and then everything else falls into place.

So as this new year approaches I want to really spend this summer at the cross, looking at what Jesus did and how I can change in order to be more like Him. I want next year to start out with some goals and as summer progresses I hope that I can blog more about what He is teaching me and what He is bringing me through! What a Blessing to know the Only One we can completely place all our trust in!