Starting the summer and learning some too!

The summer started with a bang...my little sister got married. I haven't had a chance to blog about all that I have experienced so far, but I want to do a little bit about what God is teaching me first. I started a new little devotional on The ONE Year Worship the King devotional. Mainly I do need something to go through in order to keep me focusing on what is really important. I miss BSF and the good discussions we had each week. It will be nice to be able to get back to that in the fall. For now though...the focus....worship.

God has been teaching me a lot about worship this past year. I think that I used to categorize worship into this place where it is just singing...and that is all. But as I have pondered the idea of worship and what it truly means I realize that it is a lifestyle. My lifestyle should be worship to God. I don't think that is always the way I see it, but what I do and who I am should always be worship to God. He is righteous and Holy and it is my job to focus on that and love Him the way He deserves, with my whole being.

Today I read through Isaiah 51:1-8. The idea is that I should not fear the reproach of man. Being in the states I think I am more apt to fear the reproach of man than I do in BKK. I mean being here it is super easy to get caught up in the things that do not make me righteous. The things that bring me down and that I allow to take place of my Savior. How easy is it for me to sleep in late and then miss my time with God. Or just get so busy doing nothing that I do not pick up my Bible and really spend time with Him.

God is saying to me...stop...focus and worship.

How often do I stop...focus and worship? Not very often. I am so distracted by this trip or that. Or making sure that I have enough money to pay bills or fly to this place or that place. I just get so caught up that I forget to just stop...focus and worship.

So.....this summer...maybe I should just be stopping all the busy lifestyle and spend time just resting in Him...after all isn't that what summer is for?

Being back in the states....

As I sit here getting ready to go on my 10 hour road trip to Michigan, thoughts come through my mind about how quickly I have gotten used to living in the states again. It seems to me that life just goes back to its easy self. I mean I just jump in my car and pretty much am able to go just about anywhere I want, whenever I want to go. How can I stop from getting used to this life? Do I even want to stop it? I don't know that I do...yet I feel that there may come a time when I want to live in the states again....as I look at my friends and family who have the house, the marriage, the kids...I think that would be nice. But then I see other family and friends that have broken marriages, kids who are lost in the world, or not around at all to experience life and I think....well I wouldn't want to trade places with them. I love serving God, living for Him and yes does it cause me to miss family and friends sometimes? Absolutely, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I wouldn't give it up...because my life it isn't my own and maybe I don't always choose the right things, but I am choosing the right Savior!

Packing up my classroom!

Today as I packed up my classroom there was this overwhelming sense of what that truly meant. When God led me to teach Science...it was this task that I really was excited about until I stepped into the middle school classroom. Since beginning this journey nearly 2 years ago, I think the Lord has managed to allow me to let go of every single thought that I had about what it meant to be a teacher and even more what it means to be a Follower of Christ. For I have been put into a situation of being stretched beyond what I ever thought was possible. The test that you go through when you are working with middle school students on a daily basis is just this heart-wrenching, but amazing experience. I pray and hope by God's grace that seeds were planted this year. I may never know what work God did this year and continues to do in these lives, but I know that He is touching lives, for what better way to know then when you see the enemy trying to get a hold.

I am not sure that I did such a great job this year, but as I look at the empty classroom filled with books that need to be moved to the next teacher, I just think you know it isn't about me anyways. Whatever I did or didn't do it is about God and His glory. I know there were times that I let my flesh take over, that I got upset by a parent email, or a student's lack of responsibility, but that is part of it isn't it? Part of growing and learning and living His life.

I came to Thailand 2 years ago, thinking that when the 2 years was up I would be moving on. Here I am moving on, but not in the way that I thought. I am moving to a new grade, a new classroom a new apartment, but still in the same place. Just like the empty hallways that will be filled once again in the fall with different students. My life is filled each and everyday with people. I can't help but wonder how God is going to use this summer and next year to stretch me and grow me. I am a little sad to say good-bye to this hallway and these students for they have taught me so much about myself, about who God has called me to be and where I need to grow. I can't say enough how perfect it is when you are in the middle of God's will. Never have I been at such peace. Sure I wonder where He will take me next and what I will encounter but you know what? I am content with what He has me doing for now! I am excited to be teaching next year and learning so much about fourth graders.

I guess the real point of this blog is to say that I am not the same person I was when I came to Thailand two years ago. I feel like I had no idea what a real relationship with God was all about, or at least I was just beginning to understand. In these past two years I have had more ups and downs than I really ever care to have again, but you know what it has been totally worth it! I have learned that God's purposes and ways are higher and bigger than mine and all I need to do is trust Him!


So...good-bye to Middle School.....I enjoyed this time, it taught me A LOT and showed me how God gives grace, because really if I didn't have that I wouldn't have made it!

My classroom....getting all ready to go!


Hydroponics...
I will miss you MS 407.....lots of fun was had here!